Brainless Boneheads: Maine Man Confesses Planned Crimes to Uber Driver on the Way
Welcome to Brainless Boneheads! Every Friday, Don Chase & Sarah find some of the wildest, craziest stories out there to help kick off your weekend with a smile.
– Brainless Boneheads is a regular Friday feature from Don Chase & Sarah. Read more Brainless Boneheads here.
Arrested 12 Times This Year
From the “you can’t fix stupid” file, 41 year-old Kevin Gray needed a lift to his local T.J. Maxx store. Using his mobile device, he scheduled an Uber and for reasons we may never know, on the way, he confessed his plan to his driver. His plan was to rob the T.J. Maxx. He also bragged about having drugs and then displayed the drugs. He even confessed that there were warrants out for his arrest. As expected, once Kevin exited the Uber, the driver dialed 9-1-1. Police quickly showed and rearrested Kevin. For the record, police and Kevin are on a first name basis after Kevin’s twelfth arrest this year.
Professional Wedding Crasher
Look, I’m not saying this is a GOOD idea, but on our scale of brainless boneheads, it’s also not the WORST idea we’ve seen… 57-year-old Sandra made a job out of being a professional wedding crasher. She’s been hanging out at wedding receptions for over 5 years stealing from strangers! And she was fairly smart about it too – waiting for the perfect moment. You know, the couple cutting the cake, the first dance, etc. She would wait until no one was looking and steal gifts, cards, cash, and anything else she could get her hands on. She was finally caught and charged with a ton of charges including trespassing and disturbing the peace.
Vintage Gadgets: Outdated Tech That Still Sparks Joy
A Physical Calculator
You probably haven’t seen a calculator in ages, but a Reddit user chimed in to say that, for them, the old-school scientific calculator beats the one on your phone or any app. They simply put it like this, “Honestly, a standard scientific calculator is just easier to use than your phone’s built-in scientific calculator.” It could be the fun button-tapping sound or the nostalgic thrill of typing in cheeky words with numbers that makes this person prefer calculators.
Kanizphoto/ Getty Images
Watches That Only Tell The Time
Smartwatches may pack in loads of features, but there’s a catch – they need regular charging and maintenance, and their battery life is shorter. On the flip side, traditional watches are a low-maintenance choice with longer battery life. In fact, a Redditor mentioned they still rock a “a lovely, inexpensive, bombproof, analog, big face Casio.” They also pointed out that smartwatches aren’t allowed at their job, so their trusty Casio gets the job done.
popovaphoto/ Getty Images
CD Player, MP3 Player, and Vinyl Albums
If you’ve put a ton of effort into collecting CDs and vinyl records, and creating some killer playlists, why ditch them, right? One person told their story about growing up in the ’90s, building a massive CD collection, and stashing them all in one of those Case Logic CD binders. They fondly shared, “I still keep it with me in my car and it’s a wonderful trip down memory lane every time I open it. I laughed and cried a little when my kids friend asked me what it was and I said, ‘CDs’ and they followed up with, ‘What’s that?'” But also: not everything is available on streaming services. That obscure soundtrack or tribute album from the ’80s? Licensing issues may have prevented it from hitting the streamers. Love Joni Mitchell? Well, Spotify doesn’t have her catalog. Sure, you can subscribe to another service, but if you kept your old vinyl and have a turntable, you can listen to it the old school way.
IngaNielsen/ Getty Images
"I Love Wires"
You have people who can’t stand a tangle of wires in their tech setup, and then there’s that Reddit user who’s all about the wired life. They firmly believe that wired networking is “not obsolete or outdated.” According to them, it’s superior in every aspect, except for the mobility it lacks compared to wireless. They put it simply, “Wired is the ideal, you only go wireless if running cable is unfeasible for the situation.
Diana Sand/ Getty Images
A Regular Doorbell
A regular doorbell does its job well. It lets you know someone’s at the door. On the other hand, a video doorbell does the same but with the perk of letting you see and hear the person at your door, even if you’re not home. Someone mentioned they’d be up for a smart doorbell if it kept the data local. They said, “I don’t want anything being sent online, so I might need to set up my own system… I’ll just stick with the traditional kind.”
eurobanks/ Getty Images
Physical Buttons
A Redditor shared their affection for good old physical buttons, arguing that not everything needs to go the touchscreen route. They stressed the importance of having car radios equipped with buttons rather than screens, believing it’s a safer choice. They explained, “It’s easier for me to push a button to change the music while keeping my eyes on the road/ I can’t do that if my car has a screen. It increases distracted driving incidents.”
Supersmario/ Getty Images
